Meet Alexus Lamara,
Beauty. Boss. Believer.
1. What do you think it means to be a good girl?
My meaning for this has changed so much over the years. Though today I'll say, a good girl is a girl who's willing to be herself and embrace who she is even if it means she's left standing alone.
A good girl works hard for what she wants even if everyone around her is taking the easier route. She's constantly challenging herself to take the straight and narrow path. She doesn't allow her past to let her think she can't reach goals, dreams, and heights that maybe years ago seemed unrealistic.
A good girl stands for something. She sees the change that people need, and she becomes it. She doesn't allow people's opinions to hold her back from making a difference.
2. How did you get into lashes? How's your experience been as a young businesswoman?
Before moving back to my hometown in Richmond, Virginia, I lived in Atlanta, Georgia. That was where I was first introduced to Lash Extensions.
I got my lashes done a few times, and then my mom brought to my attention that one of the best lash techs in Atlanta was hosting a class teaching students how to apply lash extensions. I jumped right on it! It was hard to get the hang of it at first. I actually waited a whole year before I started, but now I'm doing my thing.
A few months after I began lashing I started my business, By Alexus Lamara. By Alexus Lamara specializes in lash extensions in the Richmond and New York areas, catering to all women interested in enhancing their beauty. I've only been in business for a little over a year now, and I feel like I could write an entire book on the entrepreneur experience. It definitely requires a lot of faithing it til' you make it.
Overall, being a young business woman is definitely shaping me into a better woman in general. The long hours, early mornings, lack of emotion I have to have sometimes, assertiveness, and confidence I have to have to successfully run my business runs over into other areas of my life. As my business grows, so do I. It's an interesting journey.
3. Tell us about your Makeupless Monday challenge...
This question really just put some fire under my butt! I have actually stepped away from doing Makeupless Mondays, and said that I would figure out a way to revamp it and reach my followers in a different way. I've been slacking though. I'm going to get back on it after this!
Makeupless Mondays was a self love challenge I started a year ago where I asked my followers to post a makeupless photo of themselves on Mondays. My hope was that by posting a makeupless photo it would help them to become more comfortable in their skin and with their most natural selves. So many women today lack self confidence, self love, and self value, and it shows through how they carry themselves and the decisions they make. Makeupless Mondays was my effort to help more women embrace themselves and become more confident, and in return make healthier decisions in relationships, friendships, and on a day to day basis.
4. You're so beautiful with a bangin' body. How do you handle all the attention from guys?
Wow! Thank you so much!
It's so funny that you'd ask because to be honest I don't really get that much attention. I'm not sure if I'm just intimidating, or if it's something that I give off that makes them feel like I won't give them a chance so they just don't approach me? I do get a lot of stares though just not a lot of verbal attention, if that's a thing. I don't know, guys are weird.
Right now I'm so in my zone that when guys do approach me I'm just like "nah". There's a time for everything and now just isn't my time for that.
Actually a year ago, I promised myself and God that I wouldn't talk to anyone new, go on any dates, and have any sexual relations for an entire year. I wanted to give myself time to fully heal from past relationships, and give God my full attention so that he could work on me from the inside out. It's been one year and four months since I've made that promise, and I'm still on the same kick. I stuck to it. Recently, I committed to giving God one more year of just me and him, so that he can continue to work on me and help me to grow in some areas. Though, when attractive guys approach me, I may give a little convo, but nothing more than that. No number exchanges. Temptation is of the devil, and I plan to keep the promise I've made to myself and God once again this time around. To my future husband though, if you're reading this, you've got one more year to get it together. Okay? Cool.
5. Can you share some of your story about when you were 20, some mistakes you made and how did you overcome? Take us through your journey of the "return" of the good girl...
20 is a touchy subject for me. It was a very interesting year. Before I go any further I must first say this, for the first and last time, if you were apart of my twentys then you play a major role in who I've become, so I'm thankful for you and I send nothing but love your way. Unfortunately for some, my life is my testimony and some things I share may offend you, but that is not my intention.
I was living in Atlanta, running the streets and all into the wrong things. I fell in love for the first time, and I really think I could just stop right there because that pretty much sums it up.
I'm just kidding, I'll keep going. I think one of the many mistakes I made at 20 was not listening. I felt like I was free to do as I pleased, and no one could tell me otherwise. Had I listened to my mom, family, and friends, I could've avoided a lot of hardships. Trying to be cute and hard headed gets you no where fast.
Another huge mistake I made was giving too much of myself to people I knew hadn't worked for my love or shown me that they deserved my love. When you don't value yourself, which I did not, you allow people to use you, take advantage of you, and abuse you because you don't think you could have better. So often after failed unhealthy relationships, whether it's a friend or an intimate relationship, we blame the other person. The only person you should be blaming is yourself. I ignored signs showing me that certain people cared more about themselves than they did me, but because I thought I couldn't obtain better I settled. I settled for people who would manipulate me into thinking they're adding to me just so they could take advantage of me, and I'm to blame. I take full responsibility for what I allowed.
After my last failed relationship, I realized that what I lacked was the problem. I didn't love myself, value myself, respect myself, or have confidence in who I was. I don't even think I knew who I was, and because of that I had no voice. When I began to put my problems in the hands of God, and kept growing closer to him, he in return began to perform a miracle on the inside of me. He changed me and how I saw myself. I realized that God used my last relationship to turn my life around, and all the bad things that happened he turned around for my good. I'll never go back to being the girl I used to be. We'll refer to the old me as Alexus, B.C. (before Christ) because I don't know who or where I would be if he hadn't saved me.
6. What's your stance on the light skin vs dark skin debate?
It's almost sad that it's 2017, and it's still a thing. I've actually been in situations recently where I've been out with my friends, all of my friends are lighter than me, and a guy will be staring at my friends then get to me and like turn their head or look over me. Im a very observant person by the way. I think to put one woman above the other because of their skin tone is so shallow. All skin tones are equally as beautiful as each other, and the fact that some guys still care about your skin tone is something I just shake my head about then move on from the subject. Thinking about it too much can be such a confidence killer, and I'm for sure anti-confidence killers.
To answer your question, I am pro inner beauty, and that speaks volume over skin tone. If you struggle with your skin tone because you feel like other shades are more attractive, start working on building your inner confidence then you'll demand who's ever attention you want to get. Regardless of your skin tone. Uh, hello!
7. Describe yourself in a song...
**Goes through Spinrilla's DJ Rugga Rell Summer 2017 mixtape** I am such a trappy. I listen to trap music all day long. If I'm not listening to Gospel then I'm probably listening to trap. You've got to have balance.
If I had to pick a song to describe myself though I'd go with Drake's "Started From The Bottom". Cliche I know, but he's my favorite rapper so I had to go with one of his songs. Plus, I feel like my glow up in the last year has been so real. When I rehearse what God has done in my life, and how low I was just a year ago compared to now it's almost unbelievable.
There are times where I'm around people I use to be around years ago who would over look me, and now they can't take their eyes off of me. I use to fantasize about being certain people's friends, and now they want to be my friend. It sounds childish, but it's real. It's like the kind of experience Drake raps about in "Started From The Bottom" where he comes into fame and now everybody wants to say they know him or wants to talk to him. That's my life right now. I don't think it's that I look much different. I think it's more so that God has done such a change on the inside of me, that certain people are starting to gravitate toward me for reasons they can't even explain.
In no way shape or form do I feel like I've arrived yet, but a year ago I was at my lowest and the year before that I lost myself completely. Just to see who I've become now and experience all these talents and gifts God is bringing out of me, makes me realize I started from nothing. Look at me now, flourishing into this young woman who two years ago seemed so far out of reach.
8. What's your ultimate goal?
This has changed so much in a year's time. My goal has always been to be successful in whatever I do. I wanted to open up a bigger beauty studio offering a multitude of services. I wanted to work with beauty brands like L'Oréal, M.A.C., Covergirl and add the authenticity of my brand to theirs. I also wanted to see six figures by the end of the next year. Though I still want to achieve all of those things, over time I've realized that those goals are very self centered. I forgot that I was put on this earth to bring God pleasure and fulfill the purpose and goals he has for me, and not the ones I've created for myself.
Now my ultimate goal is to please God. I want my life and how I love to make God smile. I want to live a life that goes along with the life God has planned for me. I haven't quite figured out what his purpose is for my life, but my ultimate goal right now is to figure it out.
I've learned that without God I am nothing. He's brought me so far, and I would hate for him to feel like I don't appreciate what he's done by going about things my way instead of his way. I'm perfectly fine with putting my self centered ways on the back burner, and figuring out where God's way will take me.
9. What advice would you give to our good girls reading this?
Don't give up! Being a good girl can sometimes be exhausting and frustrating, and it seems like the not so good girls are getting ahead much faster. Never forget that slow and steady wins the race. Those other girls will be tired and burnt out before they ever touch the finish line.
Good girl, you are special because you can't be imitated. What makes you so unique is that you are authentically you, in your own lane moving at your speed. You are your only competition. Keep focusing on what's ahead of you, and not behind, to the right, or to the left of you. Now is the time to keep your faith strong. You're on the right track, now just do everything in your power to stay here.
If you've made it this far down the page, I want to say THANK YOU! I pray that God allows my words to do all that he intends for them to do in your life. May my life be an example for you to keep pushing, and never give up. *In my Drake voice* STARTED...
Keep up with me on Instagram @Alexus.Lamara, and my business page @ByAlexusLamara
If interested in booking a lash appointment with me or for a free consultation please visit ByAlexusLamara.AcuityScheduling.com