Any friendship is going to be hard work. They take trust, commitment, and honesty to be successful. But how do you know if this relationship is worth fighting for?
I suppose some of us struggle with friendships, because as women, we are natural born nurturers. We are loving, patient, and compassionate. Our strengths can also be our weaknesses, and because of that we may not be able to accurately judge the difference between trials and tribulations verses a situation that’s borderline toxic.
Time and loyalty also play a major role in friendships. Knowing someone for a long time, can make you feel obligated to deal with their toxic behavior, and you even begin to make excuses for them.
Not only is this harmful for your sanity & mental health, but it’s also not healthy for your friend. You should never feel guilty for wanting to remove people out of your life who cause you pain. At times, we have to be honest with ourselves, and realize when it’s time to move on from people we love that are holding us back from our full potential.
Some of you may ask, how do you know if your friendship is a toxic? Here’s a few questions.
· How do you feel when you are with that friend?
· Does this person hurt your feelings constantly? Finding ways to bring you down?
· Do you question their intentions within your friendship?
· Are you constantly making excuses for their behavior?
· Do you even like the type of person you are friends with?
These questions may seem self-explanatory, but some of us don’t realize the harsh reality of how exhausting some of our true relationships are.
Now its your turn to look in the mirror. Ask yourself a different set of questions.
Do I always revert my friend’s venting session or storytelling back to me? “Oh yeah, that happened to me” kinda friend vs simply listening to listen & not to respond
Are you genuinely happy when your friend wins even if you’re still losing?
You could very well be the toxic friend in the equation, and be completely unaware. If you are, it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Acknowledging is always the first step of growth.
We all, eventually, enter new seasons of life, and removing toxic people is part of the process.
Ladies, we should always strive to be positive, motivating, and honest friends who know how to take ownership of our faults. Surround yourself with people who see the value in your friendship and not those who just take advantage.
I encourage you all to evaluate yourself first, then friendships you hold dear…there may be some major adjustments to be made sis.