Love speaks to me through how I see myself growing through you and how I see you growing through me, even if that means that the growth induced by our relationship are the tools you need to be the right man for the woman God has for you, even if she isn’t me.
I am mature enough today to say that sometimes the heartbreak we experience in our relationships with others, teach us more about ourselves than anything else can. They do say that experience is the greatest teacher and I would agree. Many argue that we lead our lives transcribed by our experiences, transcribed by how we interpret the things around us. So for me, growing up I have only had close experiences with unhealthy relationships but I knew from seeing unhealthy relationships what I did not want for my life.
Watching fruitless relationship, after fruitless relationship made me wonder why this union even exist if it brings no purpose. Healthy relationships help you grow. Period.
Any relationship stunting your growth is not help, but is company and very unhealthy. Company comes in your house (your spiritual space, where you go internally to experience God and experience peace) and eats all of your food (the gems you have inside of you that keep you going) leaving you empty.
A healthy relationship is like nurturing a garden, where both of you are the gardners and both of you act as plants. You plant the seed of a relationship, you water each other everyday and you both grow into healthy, beautiful plants, but if one of you doesn’t water the other, the flower begins to wilt and eventually it will die. That is the cost of keeping company in your space. You will water them with what God put in you to water someone else with who has what you need to grow, but you are expanding your energy towards helping company who don’t possess the capacity to help you the way God knows you need to be helped in return.
Company comes around when they need something from you, help is there to lift you up when you start falling even when you can't see or feel yourself falling, help feeds the parts of you God knows you need cultivating in.
While you are waiting for help, don't wait silently or with anxiety, wait in prayer knowing that you will be whole and at peace with God when it is time to share yourself with someone else, wait in patience knowing that you will be ready to receive what God has for you in due season and wait in productivity, shifting your focus towards your work (within yourself, your career, passion etc.), you will begin manifesting the things you need for your growth and purpose to be induced. Focus on the work, the help you NEED will show up when your deepest focus is in your passion and within.
