Y'all don’t like, like Michelle Obama

I was having a conversation with one of my coworkers, and we were talking about women empowerment, and protecting our own. Somehow, we got on the topic of Michelle Obama, and she said:

We don’t really like Michelle Obama, the way we say we do, we like her because we can’t reach her.”

That conversation has forever changed my perspective on the togetherness of black women.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Michelle and I think without her Barak Obama wouldn’t have been half the president he was.

Beside every strong man is a strong woman, I agree to all of that.

I just don’t agree that we like Michelle Obama as much as we project too.

When Michelle Obama released her book, it sold out within two hours. Lines were so long in NYC for her book signing meet-and-greet, I even tried to get off work to go support, but I ended up just putting it on my Christmas wish-list.

Back to the point. We as black women love black women when they can’t touch us. Yes, I said it.

We love Michelle Obama, Angela Bassette, Viola Davis, Shonda Rhimes, etc. Because, we know that we aren’t aiming for that position, or that they are in a position that can’t be touched.

However we have friends who are “Michelle Obama”, “Beyonce”, and Viola and it’s hard for us to support their business, clothing line, or even read their blog post.

But, when it was time to support Michelle Obama everybody dropped everything to STAN, don’t get me wrong I am here for black women uplifting black women, but I also wished it started at home.

By home, I mean within our own friendships and relationships. How many more Michelle Obama’s would there be, if we invested in our friends the way we invest in people we’ve never met?

How many more opportunities could brown girls achieve when they seek out a mentor and actually get a response, versus us, just screenshoting their comment in support of us, but never reaching out to give them the formula?

How many more internships and jobs could we have? If we opened the doors up to our sisters, and helped train them to be better?

Just think about, how the local singers, fashion designers, your cousin who's a hairstylist that you don’t pay, could have been worth, if we just paid a little more attention, and invested more time and money into their craft.

It’s enough room at the top for all of us, and I wonder how many Michelle Obama’s there would be, if we supported, loved on, bragged about, invested in, made better, uplifted, prayed about, and shared the air with.

Black women, we need each other more than anything. What’s the point of Michelle Obama, if it could only be, just one?

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What’s for you, won’t pass you.

Lately, I’ve been trying to figure out the placement over my life. Figuring out the purpose, what’s for me, what’s not, whose in the way of my end destination, do I even have a end destination set for me? Etc. All these things led me to isolation, deep thought, and prayer. I had to ask myself so many questions. I had to stop questioning faith and start trusting my inner strength and realize that whatever is for me, will always be for me, no matter how many people try to obstruct my view, create detours, and stop signs, whatever is for me, will forever be my vision no matter if other people can see it or not.

Let me break it down.

A lot of times, we as people rush the process because we live in a microwave society, meaning everything is hot for 30 seconds, then not, and the cycle continues.

We are in such a rush to make it to social media with a long paragraph about our accomplishments that when our destiny takes longer than the time we allotted for it, we start to panic and question if this is even for us.

Not realizing, that no one put a time on anything but man. God works at his pace and places you where he sees you are fit for this season. But, we are so caught up in rushing things that we don’t even take a second to realize the magnitude of the blessing we are currently in.

Not everything you are doing is meant to last forever. But everything is purposeful and is meant to teach you something before you embark on your next journey.

If you want this top career, and you never had to work in an environment that took the passion from you, how will you appreciate good when you get it?

If you want this epic love story, brown sugar, love jones type vibe, but you never knew what it felt like to be in a Whitney and Bobbi stage (they were honestly goals, minus the drugs, so this is a toxic comparison don’t lose me). How would you know what not to ask for when you’re looking for love?

I’m not saying that everyone must experience bad to attain good, or at least appreciate the bad. I’m saying that there is a plan over your life, that is much bigger than your “right now”, and soon as you realize that, your perspective on your current state will change.

Granted, hell is not fun for anyone, feeling like you’re lost and your next is nowhere near isn’t easy.

But once you start to picture where you were, and look at where you are currently, and align it to where you see yourself, it all seems like a puzzle of growth.

God is planting certain pieces so you can attain the masterpiece.

Stop comparing your 9-5 to an Instagrammer's 300k, stop comparing your hustle to someone who has a different vision. Your come up won’t be there come up because God gave you all two separate visions with a different purpose attached to it.

What's for you, will never miss you, it may avoid you until you’re ready, it may drag its feet, it may wait until it has perfected a recipe, but it will never miss you.




As I Am.

For years I’ve always let other people decide my worth, and the place that I held in their lives. I’ve forced friendships, forced conversations, and even forced myself to be more involved in the movement of others, that I didn’t take any time for myself to do all of the things I was meant to be doing.

That’s until I looked around one day and noticed, what pouring into others did to me. It made me isolate myself when I was angry, it made me depressed, it consumed my spirit and I turned hateful. I never knew how much damage pouring from an empty cup would have, until I was fishing for someone to give me a drop of what I’ve been giving them.

I always thought that if I was a good person things would pan out for me in the end, no matter how depressing or lonely it was to be a good person. If I put good into the world and love with all of me, it will come back full force. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve definitely reaped the blessings of all that I’ve sown. But it didn’t necessarily work out the way I once thought it did. Giving your all and being a good person is one thing. But allowing yourself to be used, manipulated and always going above and beyond for people who don’t want to do the same is different.

I can love all of you, and still limit the number of texts I send, limit the number of favors, and take control over my role in your life.

People automatically assume that you are mean and you’ve changed, once you shift your role in their life. They are so used to you always being available, and accepting every excuse they have, that when you don’t respond the way they hoped, they are confused and want nothing to do with you.

But, I am here to tell you. That people do all of the things for those they deem important, anything you want isn’t far fetched or out of reach. You can have anything you plan for, anything you think you want, and all you deserve.

Stop allowing people to suck the life out of you.

If they want you in their life, they need to take you as you are.


Where Da Bag At?

When the Price Has Always Been Right


Val·ue (n): The regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.

In 2019, I’ve made a commitment to spend less coin on food and clothes, and save it for things I really need. Most of us know when it comes to money as a college student, or as a shopaholic, will power is nonexistent. But apart of you, dreams of saving up all that money and using it to buy something you’ve been dying to have.

I can remember my senior year of high school, I waited until after graduation to purchase this expensive purse I wanted. I had just collected money from my graduation party and I knew exactly what I wanted. This purchase had been planned for a few months and I knew the price was steep, but to me, it was worth it all.

Immediately after I bought it, I treated it like it was my most prized possession. No one could touch it. No one could even breathe on it. The bag did not leave my sight. It always remained in mint condition.

Why is it that I immediately started to treat this bag with such care?

Because I knew the cost. I knew how much it was worth, so I chose to treat it carefully.

Looking back, I find myself asking why I sometimes don’t see myself like I saw that expensive purse.

Sometimes I don’t treat myself as if I’m my most prized possession.

Sometimes I don’t treat myself as if I’m useful or even worth anything.

But think of all the jobs a bag does. Beautiful on the outside, but carries all the essentials in the inside. Useful and necessary but poised and elegant. Can stand alone or make the perfect ensemble. It can take many forms but still provides the same luxury and value.

It’s 2019, and it’s time for us to stop negotiating our worth and explaining our value when we are in fact IT.

Your price just went up and you’re worth every last penny.


Mirror, What do You See?

I look in the Mirror and I see the biggest distraction staring back at me.

I look shyly into the mirror seeing everything that is not right; its crippling.

I can't seem to breathe in enough air fast enough to keep up with my heart beat.  

I look in the mirror and the biggest distraction is staring at me,

Relentlessly.

There's a light that shimmers in the eye of my distracted mind and that glimmer of hope, fate, whatever it was, saved me.

She is beautiful, She is Kind, She is Patient and she is wise they say, but what she sees no one else would believe.

The mirror reflects the naked truth, the truth we escape from, the truth, we hide from, the truth we neglect, the truth we won't accept.  

But why, willfully accept the lies and deceit the mind tries to feed you.

But why, willfully accept the lies and deceit society tries to feed you.

But why,

But why not, close your eyes and remember why and what

What you were put on this earth to do.

The voices of those who echo your life have no dominion over the things you will do.

Look in the mirror and see a new you.

A you who will transcend above the lies your insecurities feed you.


Take a look in the mirror.


Gift of a Clean Slate

Truthfully sis—we all know college is not easy.

Whether you’ve maximized  your productivity or procrastinated by binge watching Netflix, it is important not to be too hard on yourself.

Gift yourself the gift of relaxation. You’ve made it to the end of the semester. That is an accomplishment in itself. Like everything in life, school has its ups and downs and sometimes you find you’re spreading yourself too thin.

Finals season can be extremely overwhelming and knowing your grade is at stake makes it even more nerve wrecking.

Take this semester as an experience to learn from. Reflect on your growth and what you can work on.

One bad grade does not define you. Challenge yourself to do better next semester.

If there is one thing college has taught me it is that you're going to make mistakes and you are going to fail. It's up to you to decide whether you will embrace it and come back stronger or slack off and become stagnant. All this means is that you are better equipped to take on next semester full force with more experience under your belt.

You deserve a clean slate.  

Leave your grades to God and keep pushing. Take this break to recollect and work on yourself. What’s in the past is in the past.

Relax, getting overwhelmed doesn't help your productivity or growth and certainly does not put you in the right mindset to create bigger and better goals for the next semester.  

If you are someone who works hard all year, be confident in the work that you have done this year and that your hard work will pay off.

You’re doing it , and that’s most important !


Sis you got this!!


Don’t December

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I was having a conversation with my aunt and we were talking about eating healthier before the new year. She suggested the Keto diet, knowing that I am picky eater and my life isn’t conducive to make major life changes at this point. I decided that I would just eliminate three things that I eat often to start me off.

I called these: The three Don'ts for December. Even though they consisted of saying no to soda, coffee and potatoes. I wanted to take it a step further with my personal life. I thought about “Don’t stress” “Don’t overexert”, and “Don’t hold on to dead weight”.

During the holiday season we get so caught up in the commercial part of it that we tend to become different people and have different triggers. Even though the holidays are supposed to be a happy time, it’s not always happy for everybody and as humans we tend to cause some of this unhappiness just by doing too much.

“Don’t Stress”: Learning to not stress over things you can’t control whether that’s the gifts we can’t give or the people who just start to become distant to us. Is so essential, as humans we tend to carry the weight of others and it begins to weigh us down simply because we don’t know how to say no. We are so overly emotional and worked up on pleasing and giving during November and December that we don’t think it’s okay to have limitations on what we will and won’t do. Well, you have to in order to maintain your sanity and your peace, stop spending more than five minutes stressing over something that you won’t invest five years into.

“Don’t overexert”: This is us always over working in friendships, relationships and at our actual job. We always overexert when it comes to the livelihood and love of others but don’t overexert when it comes to our passion and our dreams. Stop running on E for someone else's dreams and never attempt to fill up for your own. By nature we are taught to grind and work hard, you can do all that and still have enough left for you, stop emptying your cup to fill others.

“Don’t hold on to dead weight”: We are about to transition into the new year, dead weight shouldn’t have been carried into the month of November, but it definitely can’t make it into the month of December. Let Go, it’s too much to live for, too much to invest in, to be holding onto people who let go a long time ago. During the Holidays we tend to keep people around for extra company, but that’s actually the time we should be letting the ones we are unsure of go, don’t bring no mess into your new season of blessings.

Saying No is easier said than actually done, but it’s possible. Understand that you’re worth everything and more, you’re worth you. Not just you, but happy you, excited you, stress free you, don’t let people or things destroy your spirit if they didn’t help build it.


The Beauty In Starting Over

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There was a time where I couldn’t imagine giving up my current life to start a new one. I was content with how things were going in my love life and even at my job. My thought process was “I will never find someone like this person” and “I will never find a job that pays what they pay even though it sucks working here”. I was using my past experiences and the experiences of those around me to measure how I was somewhat lucky.

There were people in other relationships going through worse than I ever dealt with and I convinced myself that I was good with who I committed to and I was good where I was at. While the person I was with wasn’t perfect they were mine and I had someone to call my own. We had history and that history meant a lot to me. We had experienced a lot together and had plenty of great moments that I didn’t want to let go of nor did I want anyone else to experience how good of a person they were or could be. You don’t realize you holding on to how things used to be and the hope of things getting better.

We hold on for dear life with hopes that there will be a happily ever after one day but essentially the relationship doesn’t get better and we’ve allowed ourselves to go in circles because we refuse to let go and start over. There will come a day where so much has happened that you have no choice but to let go. There’s beauty and resilience in that. The universe lets you know that you have to be brave enough to move on and start fresh. The universe will tell you “ let go or get dragged!”

You don’t have to forget about the moments or how good of a person they were. But you do have to realize that they no longer serve you and it’s okay if you let go and they find someone new.

Sometimes your job no longer serves you it’s okay to put yourself first and start another one. Happiness is not about the people or things you have in life it’s a state of being okay with the way life plays out even if it’s not the way you planned.  

Being fearless allowed me to start over to see who I can be by myself. I wanted to start a relationship with myself to learn more about what I wanted, liked, didn’t like and what I needed. Once I made the decision to start over I also made a promise to myself to never go back. Whoever is meant to be in my life will have to be on the same wavelength as me, they will have to meet me where I am as I expand my horizons. Till this day, giving myself the power to start over was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Starting over gave me the opportunity to meet someone new who loved me in ways I didn’t know was possible because I was so closed off to new love. I had never seen a love like this up close and personal, so I wasn’t aware that it even existed. They too, are a good person who understands my love language and are committed to seeing me smile daily. There are other good people, jobs and friends out there, but it’s about finding the ones that are good for you!

I am no longer afraid to let people or jobs go and start over because new love, opportunities, friendships, and jobs that value me do exist. I’ve also realized no one and nothing belongs to me and vice versa which makes it so much easier for me to let go, let God and never settle.


God Send Me Help, Not Company

Love speaks to me through how I see myself growing through you and how I see you growing through me, even if that means that the growth induced by our relationship are the tools you need to be the right man for the woman God has for you, even if she isn’t me.

I am mature enough today to say that sometimes the heartbreak we experience in our relationships with others, teach us more about ourselves than anything else can. They do say that experience is the greatest teacher and I would agree. Many argue that we lead our lives transcribed by our experiences, transcribed by how we interpret the things around us. So for me, growing up I have only had close experiences with unhealthy relationships but I knew from seeing unhealthy relationships what I did not want for my life.

Watching fruitless relationship, after fruitless relationship made me wonder why this union even exist if it brings no purpose. Healthy relationships help you grow. Period.

Any relationship stunting your growth is not help, but is company and very unhealthy. Company comes in your house (your spiritual space, where you go internally to experience God and experience peace) and eats all of your food (the gems you have inside of you that keep you going) leaving you empty.

A healthy relationship is like nurturing a garden, where both of you are the gardners and both of you act as plants. You plant the seed of a relationship, you water each other everyday and you both grow into healthy, beautiful plants, but if one of you doesn’t water the other, the flower begins to wilt and eventually it will die. That is the cost of keeping company in your space. You will water them with what God put in you to water someone else with who has what you need to grow, but you are expanding your energy towards helping company who don’t possess  the capacity to help you the way God knows you need to be helped in return.

Company comes around when they need something from you, help is there to lift you up when you start falling even when you can't see or feel yourself falling, help feeds the parts of you God knows you need cultivating in.

While you are waiting for help, don't wait silently or with anxiety, wait in prayer knowing that you will be whole and at peace with God when it is time to share yourself with someone else, wait in patience knowing that you will be ready to receive what God has for you in due season and wait in productivity, shifting your focus towards your work (within yourself, your career, passion etc.),  you will begin manifesting the things you need for your growth and purpose to be induced. Focus on the work, the help you NEED will show up when your deepest focus is in your passion and within.



No Clout November

An Ode to Genuineness and Authenticity

“Seek out that particular mental attribute which makes you feel most deeply and vitally alive, along with which comes the inner voice which says, ‘This is the real me,’ and when you have found that attitude, follow it.” - William James

We all remember the quote, “Be yourself because everyone else is already taken.” But what does it mean? What does it look like to live genuinely?

When I think of being genuine and authentic, I think of the words: open, real, humble, sincere, honest, candid, and true. All of these words encompass what authenticity means to me.

But why is it so hard to put them into action. To let yourself be completely vulnerable, exposed, and freely be the human God has designed you to be.

Its hard because we worry we don’t fit in with the status quo. As students and young adults, we’ve unconsciously developed subcategories where we place our peers and classmates in social groups based on how they appear on the outside.

It’s important to remember that all of these sub groups and labels are temporary. The legacy that you create is so much more than the clubs you’re a part of, how much money you make, what car you drive, or how many likes you get on Instagram. You are first, human.

Humans aren't perfect creatures. We have flaws, fears, tears, mistakes, but there is no need to hide those things. Living an open and honest life just shows that you’re a human in progress. Your growth isn’t stunted you’re simply uncovering your true self.

To this day I find myself asking why I struggle to find authentic and genuine people to surround myself with. But I’ve learned recently that when you show up authentic, you create the space for people to do the same. You show others that its ok to walk in your truth.

So this holiday season, start by giving yourself the gift of being unapologetically you.The right people will respond. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

It’s okay to not be okay, but it starts with you owning it.



Address, Don't Repress

As much as who we are is a compilation of genes and traits from our parents, a lot of who are is a compilation of our life experiences and our responses to those experiences. It  is so easy in today's society to be disconnected from the truth of our emotions leading us to repressing the experiences we have. We have lost the essence of having the necessary conversations with ourselves that help us grow and help others who may experience the same trauma.

Repression of traumatic experiences are often manifested in unhealthy life practices and stunts the growth of the repressed.

Addressing the trauma of our past helps us acknowledge our pain and see where the broken pieces lay, and more importantly, a blueprint to put life back together and into your own hands. Addressing how you feel, even in your darkest moments will help you control how you feel about yourself and your emotions in the presence of a similar experience.

On the other hand, when you repress your emotions you yield all control to make a difference in how you feel about yourself and in how you interact with others.

Even if you need to talk out what you are going through to yourself in the mirror, do so and be honest with yourself about what you are feeling. There is no greater freedom than embracing the truths about ourselves, even the truths we have yet to accept.

Continuously repressing how you feel, debilitates you from truly experiencing and dealing with the emotions leaving them tightly bottled up, only to explode if left untreated.

Address the trauma you've experienced in the past, to move forward to build a healthier, happier you.


The Art Of a Good Girl’s Heart

As a Good Girl, so much of what we do is regulated by our hearts.

Sometimes we insist on getting praise for our strength and independence while we continue to neglect our heart and its condition.

We lose our footing in this terrain of self doubt and we look to other idols as our guide.

We are often taught that we are here to serve. But a woman's heart is capable of so much more.

The art of the heart is that it’s central.

Not only is it the most important organ that acts as the electrical system for the entirety of our bodies, but it is a symbol of the most powerful emotion.

Love.

There is something so fierce about a woman’s love. The heart holds this. With so much beauty to unveil, the pressure to have it all together can weigh heavy. One by one we place each burden on our shoulders as our heart begs for help.

Take a moment. Breathe. Listen to your heart.

It’s time to realize that it’s ok not to be ok. The rhythms of a good heart can beat off tempo from time to time. But the art of the heart is that it still beats. So brace yourself for an adventure. One that looks like restoration and release. It’s not always about finding out who you ought to be but discovering who you already are. A Good Girl. A woman who is home to a love so fierce and full of good. It’s irreplaceable.

A good heart drives a good purpose.  

“There’s no heart without the word hear, so I listened to my heart and it brought me here” - Unknown


God's Plan?

What if God’s Plan isn’t Mine? 

 Have you ever been blessed with something so great, that you knew God was listening? He had to know what you wanted and how you were feeling to grant you with something this big, but the fear of what may come with that blessing is what scares you…

 I’ve always imagined a life with no breaks, easy sailing, going to a job I love, and feeling empowered to change a world, that doesn’t always acknowledge me, but I still feel moved to do so anyway.

I’ve never wanted to be in a place where my requests were ignored, where I am fighting back tears as I’m opening the door to my job…I feel so selfish. God has given me everything I’ve asked for and I’m still not happy. I am in a position to do God’s work, but I feel so empty, pouring from a cup that has nothing in it.  

As a black women I feel like my superpower is resilience and humility. So why can’t I bare this storm? Why can’t I stay until the rain passes? Why is it taking so much out of me to be patient and trust him? 

 I’ve never been a quitter. Life may get tough but I don’t quit, but what do you do if your mind is mentally gone and your physical presence is still?

 What happens when you think you deserve more? What if this was preparation to get me into a better position? Maybe its not that I’m being ungrateful, maybe I am realizing my worth. Maybe I am worth everything my white counterparts receive, maybe there is a life that I won’t need any escape from. Maybe this was God’s plan but just not meant for forever? 

 I am here to let you know that even the biggest blessings have the scariest side effects. We always glamorize what we’ve been through, but no one ever discusses what we’ve been brought to. How we navigate a life that seems unfulfilled even after we get everything we’ve asked. Mastering the balance between being grateful but not settle. 

 If you’re trying to decide whether you should or shouldn’t pursue something. Pursue it, God doesn’t give you any vision that you can’t make reality. It may be scary, it may be hard to leave your comfort zone, but you deserve a life that you don’t have to call out sick for. A job that will hear your needs and meets them. You deserve so much more than what you’re bargaining for. We’ve been trained and conditioned to not complain about the scraps that we’ve been given because we could have nothing. But what if you exchange complain with hustle? You can get everything. 

 Trust God & Trust His Timing even more…

Let Me Cater to Me

The Power of Saying No in Your Relationship

It’s amazing to finally find someone you’re into and love being around. The two of you embark on a relationsfhip because you clearly see potential in where the relationship can go or what the relationship can bring.

It’s so easy to get wrapped up in the person you’re now involved with and it’s so easy for you to forget about other components of your life. For some, finding this person seemed like it would never happen, so you think it’s important to make sure you do everything in your power to keep the relationship thriving.

It’s important for you to let them know you are there for them every step of the way; you’re open to doing and being everything your partner wants and needs. I get it.  We’ve all been there.

But it’s also important for us to realize that we still must take care of ourselves and we still have to be capable of saying no. It’s important not to overextend yourself in your relationship and stand your ground.

It’s ok, to say “no I can’t hang out today I have to finish my paper” or “no I cannot pop lock and drop it tonight because I am exhausted”. There is no fun in feeling forced or obligated to do a certain task. We can’t be everything to anyone or everyone.

We can barely be everything for ourselves. You should be able to say no whenever you don’t want to do something for your partner and that should be ok. There will come a time when the roles will reverse, and they will have to say no to you. We have to put ourselves first in order for the relationship to thrive.

If we’re constantly overextending ourselves physically, mentally, and financially there will come a time where we are drained and frustrated. You can’t pour from an empty cup and because you’ve never said no, they’ll be expecting you to.

Set boundaries and stick to what you value while you’re in a relationship. This can help your partner learn who you are and what’s important to you. It’s important for your partner to know they have someone who takes care of themselves and puts themselves first. This gives you both a chance and time to focus on your passions and other goals without having to constantly take care of your partners wants and needs. It’s also a relief to know you have someone who isn’t a liability but an asset.

Whenever we are saying no in our relationship, we should be communicating why, so that our partner further understands us and doesn’t feel abandoned. When our partner knows where we are coming from with our decision it’s easier for them to understand instead of feeling a lack of inclusivity or support within the relationship. Saying no is not saying no to the relationship, just one part of it. Saying no is saying yes to you and your partner living your truths and being free to truly love and know one another.


Take the Trash Out

Ever feel stuck like the monotony of life is consuming you? Like you can’t seem to get through the mud after everydays storm? Being stuck feels like writers block to a writer, missing every lay-up or free throw to a basketball player and fumbling the ball to a football player. It's the most frustrating thing, but the beautiful part is that you have the tools to undo it. When we feel stuck and claustrophobic in the spaces that once felt like home, it's time to make some serious changes that may involve relinquishing some things. In the season that you find yourself stuck in, some vital spiritual work is essential.


1) Breathe--

You are going to be ok, this too shall pass. When I say breathe, I mean it. Close your eyes and with every fiber in your being, feel yourself in your skin and remember that you still have life in you to do something different. That breathe in and out is an opportunity, an opportunity to make things right, within and with others.

2) Clean--

Literally take the trash out. Clean your physical, mental and emotional space to make room for growth. Growth cannot occur in the space of clutter. Do what you need to do to make sure that your inner space is clutter free from distraction and fear of the unknown. Cleaning your physical space helps you rid your life of everyday clutter that slows you down, cleansing your spirit rids your mind of the distraction and defeat drawing you away from your purpose.

3) Check your spirit--

When your spirit feels stuck, it is telling you that something around you is not right and that something around you is keeping you still. To combat this, rid yourself of individuals whose presence demands more of your energy than they feed you. Having draining individuals around you will keep you stagnant. Don’t stay stuck holding on to those draining you of the very superpowers you have within, the superpowers you need to take care of yourself with.

4) Pray & Read Bible--

Pray and feed your spirit with the word of God. The word of God is your armor to fight against the distraction of the flesh. If you do not believe in God, get in touch with a higher power. Getting in touch with God or a higher power will help you gain an awareness of yourself that is quintessential for growth.

5) Journal--

In your journal, explain your pain, successes, plans and goals to look back at to see how much you have grown. This will give you an incentive for your hard work and will also help you process your everyday experiences in a healthy and expressive way.

No one can take your trash out for you. Do the things you need to do for you to be in a healthy place. Life will move forward, even when you are stuck so make the necessary changes to move forward right along with life.


Can Broken Crayons Still Color?

A Crayon.

Carefully produced to create candid conversations with its canvas. Soft wax at first, then hardened to form its shape. Characterized by a unique color and placed delicately in a box surrounded by others the same, yet different.

The task of a crayon can be trying, much like the task of being a black woman. Created uniquely, each with our own color. Crafted to design art.

Constantly used and handled, exerting energy toward the things that matter to us the most. The things that help shape our masterpiece.

Expected to create something new every time. One by one each burden applies pressure. Back and forth with each stroke we begin to dull, and eventually we break.

Immediately we rush to choose a new crayon. Comparing ourselves to other crayons, blind to the fact that we’ve each been given a purpose: to bring our masterpiece to life.

Don’t be deceived. Brokenness is beautiful. It’s ok to color outside of the lines. To peel our delicate paperback. To embrace every detail. Don’t ever be ashamed of the wear and tear of your heart. We are still created to create under any circumstance. Pick up your broken pieces sis. No masterpiece was ever created by an artist who gave up.

Broken pieces contribute to your masterpiece. Broken pieces make us who we are.

Broken Crayons Still Color.

What are you going to create with the broken pieces of yourself?